164

space in your day
is carved from within you
woven into how you carry the weight
of every single day and the potential it possesses
because there really is no such thing
as the right time to do something
for there is only time, and
what we choose to do or not do with it

163

you always think that these
monumental occasions will weigh on you
this powerful compound of all your hard work
bringing you closer to this idealistic sense of self

the truth is that sometimes it comes and goes
in the middle of the night
and you don’t realize its there until
you’re sitting on your bed
realizing just how far you’ve come from the start
and that moment you once dreamt of
imagined it in the palm of your tiny hands
all those years ago
is here, right now

161

the strangest routines are now commonplace
my favourite snacks, delivered to door
no one comes to visit
new voices introduced through headphones
waving goodbye to the computer screen

how has time lapsed like
the world’s fastest stopwatch
you’d swear it was rigged
you’d swear this is ordinary

160

a lonely ghost
a light, flickered out
the one I left on for you
how often do we wish upon people
that do not wish for us

when do we turn out the lights
and walk away from the dark
on our own volition
upon belief that ghosts only haunt us
when we keep them around

158

step ladder dreams
of moving up in the world and somehow
not feeling bigger.

what is growth without acknowledgement
of what you’ve left behind
saying goodbye to the people you used to be
and opening doors for the people behind you

how happy will we be
when we reach the coveted top
and the sky is blue
and the velvet rope tapers off
the success, palatable in the air
and you end up celebrating alone?

remember the worlds you lived before this
stay humble in your pursuit
and leave the door wide open.

157

some nights when the cold wind calms
the cars stop honking
people kiss goodbye
I imagine all the ways 
my dreams are just too full
aspirations just out of reach

maybe this wasn’t meant for me
perhaps I wasn’t cut from this cloth
the wheels screech
my mind goes silent

I wonder why it is
we stop when every light is green

154

how many days do I spend thinking
I’m doing the wrong thing
letting self doubt burn me alive
dousing this fire

why is it when we think of ourselves
we first think of what we are not
how radical would it be if I
kept the flame lit
and let nothing put it out
not even me?