103

On summer days, I’d dream of flowers
wildly tamed in a tweed bouquet
delicate daisies, soft touches
I feel the wind in my fingertips

Often I dread how
summer passes in the blink of an eye
in the heat of the moment
I hope it slows down
I hope the cool will calm me

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102

I’m finding myself in hidden places
in foods I swore I hated
in places I swore I’ve been
perhaps in a past life
I could’ve been them all.

I think of each time I’ve grown
when I’ve nurtured myself from seed alone
tended to leaves that withered
waiting for them to grow back, stronger
I’ve been told that I overprune
that I’m quick to discard
failure as incurable

Perhaps one day I’ll learn
growth from grief
and leave the ugly parts alone.

pick your battles

dear, you (1)

 

You can do anything, but you can’t do everything is a quote I heard a year ago that I often play in my head when I’m feeling overwhelmed. There have been times where the goings have truly gotten tough and I wonder to myself: “How can I do all of this?”

I’m not here to tell you to get an agenda or planner. I’m here to tell you a simple response to that inner monologue:

You don’t have to.

Whether it’s at work or at home, you have a team of humans who were pulled together as a team to well, do it all as a team. There is no honour in being a martyr who can do it all, and there certainly isn’t honour in struggling but not telling anyone you need help. Sure, there may be praise for getting it all done on your own but in my experience, that praise never comes. Because when you struggle and complete the nearly-impossible tasks without asking for help, no one really understands the breadth of how much you did and thus, your hard work may go unnoticed.

Look around at the stuff you have on your plate and consider,

“Do I need to do all of it in this timeline?”

“Do I have anyone who can help with some of this?”

“Am I doing my best and still can’t do it all?”

Then, decide. All anyone can ask of you is to do your best. You have the knowledge and strength to take on anything this world is going to throw at you, but you can’t fight every single fight. Pick your battles and make these decisions out loud. Ask for help when you need it, and take a break when you know you need that, too.

 

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love,
ELLE

mind your beeswax

dear, you (1)

 

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what success means to us. Is it a nuclear family and a solid median household income? Is it travelling the world and learning new languages? Is it spending time with friends and writing your book? And if it isn’t one of these things – is that a failure?

There are so many paths to take at every point in our unique adventures. People in my life are pursuing dreams bigger and smaller than mine, but that absolutely doesn’t mean that any of us are doing this wrong.

It can feel terrifying to compare yourself to the folks on your Instagram feed. Some might have a Masters, a new family, a house, a beautiful wedding, a cool job. If you’re comparing notes with people on social media, it’s no wonder you feel like you don’t stack up.

When was the last time you shared a post online about something awful that happened to you? Probably never. And why would anyone else? In fact, maybe someone looks at your perfectly curated life online and thinks that you’ve got it all. We’re all in on this charade together.

Live your life in whatever way you’re happy with. There’s no how-to manual on navigating the rest of your life. We’ll all get there in the end. Take your time. Have fun along the way. Turn off your wifi sometimes.

 

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love,
ELLE

92

There’s a carousel of people I know
nestled into my phone feed
that are having kids, buying homes
doing everything right and
looking good doing it

There are nights I stay up late
and imagine all the things I’ve done wrong
and how I could’ve grasped perfection
plucked it off the tree
if I had tried hard enough.

By morning, I’m forgiving myself
heading to the market and seeking
only the best fruit
I’m digging my fingernails into the flesh
making sure the peach is sweet
I’m poking and prodding and
making sure there’s not a single bruise
that I end up creating one anyway.

87

spring cleaning
what am I meant to do
with all this love I have for you?
tucked away in scribbled journals
pressed old flowers
I know what clean looks like –
maybe that’s why
scrubbing you off my skin
feel so dirty.

This summer, I swear I’ll…

Dedicate time to be a better me!

As the weather gets warmer, I’m feeling productive. I’ve created a summer bucket list of things I’d like to accomplish by September to keep myself continuously improving, creating and being me, more often, and I wanted to share it with you all. Feel free to take it for your own!

  1. Write and compose a song (This one terrifies me because I know I can write lyrics but I’m not sure I can compose. Any advice, PLEASE sound off below!)
  2. Write for Medium
  3. Write for Globe and Mail
  4. Go swimming!
  5. Write for ten minutes about the Word Of The Day, everyday
  6. Buy a bike
  7. Go to two concerts
  8. Learn how to and bake macrons
  9. Go to Canada’s Wonderland (I haven’t been in years, and I LOVE roller coasters)
  10. Have three picnics (High Park, Toronto islands, Trinity Bellwoods)
  11. Go to a kickboxing class
  12. Save $4,000 (not including tuition)

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What are some things on your list? Do you have any advice for songwriting? Let me know in the comments below!

 

Love,
ELLE