Pair of keys,
I am left in the mailbox
just in case you forget yours.
Always last picked,
choosy team captains.

Once, in a dream,
I piloted my own ship
stern and bow,
then and now?
Plenty of difference.

If only my voice was louder
than the waves surrounding me,
my siren’s song, crystal clear
reeling in my catch.

I’ve forgiven a lot of awful things
just because I still loved
the mouth that said them.

If only I knew then
that apprehensive kindness
is not kindness.

If only my voice was louder
I’d say more than just what
they wanted to hear,
(maybe I’d be on my own team).
For now, I’m just a

39 thoughts on “29

  1. shoniessky

    You do very well at expressing your thoughts and feelings, very strong in your approach and very clear in metaphorical meanings. Haven’t read words so forceful yet deep in my lifetime until I’ve read your writing. Absolute best โค

    Liked by 1 person

  2. โ€œOnce, in a dream,
    I piloted my own ship
    stern and bow,
    then and now?
    Plenty of difference.โ€ Really like the comparison of outcomes between your past dream and a future reality. I hope you feel you are piloting your own ship again.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Jessica Cross

    I’m going to echo an early comment about this segment:
    โ€œIโ€™ve forgiven a lot of awful things
    just because I still loved
    the mouth that said them.โ€
    God, how I’ve felt this before. And not even solely in a romantic sense; in how many toxic relationships with friends and family have I looked the other way when people said awful things to/about me (or anyone else)? So concisely and beautifully said, and so relatable.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes! How many hurtful comments have I endured because I thought I had to? How many times should I have raised my voice and better yet–had someone listened? Thanks for commenting Jessica ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  4. “Once, in a dream,
    I piloted my own ship”

    That, the apprehensive kindness stuff, and being a parakeet…this is painfully relatable. But hey, being relatable is what art aspires to. Congrats on writing something another person can connect to. (I know I often write in hopes someone else will connect to it and feel their own voice expressed.) ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Oh, and this parakeet sings so beautifully. You had an entire relationship and life, within those words. This was wonderful.
    Honey if we were on a playing field, it would be the guys getting picked last, because you women are throwing emotion and deepened experiences we cannot keep up with.
    Yet even through it all, the parakeet retreats to her cage. You are exquisite.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Philip! I was hoping that pair of keys/parakeet idea would come through, that even though it may seem like it, you’re not just an ‘extra’ but you’re your own person! Thanks for coming by ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Among other things I particularly liked the parallel of rear and front of the boat with the then and now lines that followed. For me the mention, contrast the person then and now, as control/priority over self, life etc. Despite the answer after ?, the rest of the piece after left me wondering if & how much has changed since then. Lots of thoughts, I enjoyed reading this.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. varjakBaby

    I like this. It draws on different lines, the team I don’t know what you call it, topic, train of thought, visual, imagery. The team imagery. Or of a shy person, not able to speak up for themself. And I like the metaphor, the keys and the parakeet. Like you could take it literally, and consider the actual objects and how they feel, but maybe that is a statement on how objectified the shy person feels. The keys unlock things, but they do not speak. The parakeet just tweets and possible sings a song, but it is so small and frail.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for interpreting it! I did want the “pair of keys” as if it was a necessary attachment, something that relied on someone else. Versus the parakeet who just says what you want to hear, I wanted both subjects to be similar in their lack of autonomy, but both in their purpose. You’ve summed it up so well!


  8. glassandbone

    This is very well done. The last line, the parakeet metaphor brings it all together for me. I’ve read it three times and I get something different each time. Layered & inhabitable. ๐Ÿ’ž

    Liked by 1 person

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